Just Forget About It

August 9, 2016

Forget It
By An Unknown Author

If you see a tall fellow ahead of the crowd,
A leader of music, marching fearless and proud,
And you know of a tale whose mere telling aloud
Would cause his proud head to in anguish be bowed,
It's a pretty good plan to forget it.

If you know of a skeleton hidden away
In a closet, and guarded and kept from the day
In the dark; whose showing, whose sudden display
Would cause grief and sorrow and lifelong dismay,
It's a pretty good plan to forget it.

If you know of a spot in the life of a friend
(We all have spots concealed, world without end)
Whose touching his heartstrings would sadden or rend,
Till the shame of its showing no grieving could mend,
It's a pretty good plan to forget it.

If you know of a thing that will darken the joy
Of a man or a woman, a girl or a boy,
That will wipe out a smile or the least way annoy
A fellow, or cause any gladness to cloy,
It's a pretty good plan to forget it.

This poem asks us to forget those things that we know about another that would cause them unnecessary grief and pain. It asks us not to make them into public displays to cause harm. The purpose for this is that no good can come from it. When someone makes a mistake it only causes pain and strains or ruins relationships when we make fun sport out of them. It not only harms them but it diminishes us as well.

I don't think the author is asking us to ignore a hurt or pain that happens when someone does something to us. I believe we need to address these things with the person in a private manner to let them know how we feel and bring resolution, healing, and closure to it. The sooner we resolve it the better so that we are not left stewing over it. Just keep perspective about it; most of the time people are not aware of the effect they are having on us because they are busy with their own thoughts and perspectives of situations, their own feelings and the experiences they are having.

The author asks us to forget the "spots" of others but I also believe we need to forget our own spots as well. We need to take the time to learn from those mistakes that we have made and make amends when necessary but we need to move on and stop whipping ourselves with them. How often are we raking ourselves over the coals for things we have done in the past. Regardless of making amends and the things we have learned from them we take our mistakes and punish ourselves for not being better. Rather than celebrating our successes we tend to bring the spots up as a reminder of our imperfections and that we have to work on something else before we can be happy.

As long as you have done what is necessary to rectify things, move forward with life and let it go. Just fix it and forget it. Do this as a gift to yourself so you can enjoy your successes in life. Do this with others so you can enjoy your relationships. And when someone else's "spot" causes you grief, forgive them and forget it. Doing this isn't about them it's about you; it allows you to heal and move forward in life rather than being stuck in that moment forever in pain. 

So go and be happy and let others be happy too by planning to forget about it.

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